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Intelligent Delivery

Page history last edited by Swinefat Pink 14 years, 2 months ago


INTELLIGENT DELIVERY describes the process by which, say, lion cubs are ''delivered'' only to lion parents, or zebra foals are ''delivered'' only to zebra parents.  It is a stunning refutation of Karl Darwin's pernicious Theory of Natural Conception.


Scientific Evidence of Intelligent Delivery


Proponents of the TRVTH of ID or Intelligent Delivery (known as IDiots), under the sponsorship of the Dysovary Institute, have readily established the scientific fact that offspring are only ''delivered'' to parents of the same Biblical baramins, or "kinds."  If, as Darwin's Theory of Natural Conception falsely holds, that offspring resulted from the 'fusing' of an egg with a ''random'' tadpole, then we would expect to routinely find giraffes with litters of kittens and puppies, or sharks raising baby marmosets.  Such, of course, has never been observed either in nature or the laboratory.


IDiots recognise that the means by which the delivery of offspring only to parents of its own ''baramin'' is a Profound Cosmic Mystery to which one may only respond with a sense of Irreducible Perplexity. It is not given to mortal man to understand the ineffable ways of the Intelligent Deliverer.


Identity of the Intelligent Deliverer


In order to steer clear of the inconvenient Establishment Clause of the US Constitution, IDiots have learned to shy away from explicitly naming the Intelligent Deliverer. Although in practise most IDiots are certain the Great Stork is surely responsible, they maintain the official facade that their science alone does not rule out the possibility that the Intelligent Designer is in fact a Pelican, a Cormorant, a Blue-Footed Booby, or indeed, the folks at FedEx.


But we all know it's the Great Stork.


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